mittenmusings

I had a Very Big interview on Tuesday morning. The folks on the hiring side of the table were the usual suspects for a small company: CEO, CFO, business manager. They had obviously actually spent some time preparing questions that were thought-provoking and applicable to the position. Then, they threw me this zinger:

• “So, in Human Resources, you come across a lot of confidential information- be it about employees or perhaps the company. How do you deal with that?”

I blinked twice and took a deep breath before replying…

• “Um, you keep it confidential?”

Once they stopped laughing their asses off, I went on to ’splain that being in HR you learn a lot, no, more than you want to know sometimes about things. You just have to keep it to yourself, and keep it at the office. That’s all.

I hope I didn’t come off as a wiseass, but hey…they asked. So there.

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I had a Very Big interview on Tuesday, and it was gently suggested to me that I procure a nice outfit, aka a suit, for the event.

Now, let’s get a few things straight:

1. I hate the Mall.
2. I go the Mall maybe once a year. Seriously. Not even an Apple Store opening can get me there. And I luv me some Apple.
3. I own eleven pairs of Birkenstocks.

Needless to say, I was less than stoked to go suit shopping. However, Saturday morning I donned my Disapproving Rabbits t-shirt and went on my merry way. I hit the usual places one would imagine, the department stores, and I saw a lot of polyester blend items in questionable colors and cuts. Is an Aquamarine colored suit ever acceptable in the workplace? Have I attained the stature, er, age where an elastic waistband is a viable option? What is up with dressy bermuda shorts-like bottoms…who wears THOSE?

For the love of Pete, all I wanted was a boring grey suit. Was that to much to ask of my local mall? Also, I’d like to not pay $300, thankyouverymuch. I may be the temping-est temp in all the land, but I’m still not rollin’ in the Benjamins. After trudging through the mall for about three hours, I called my fella. “Honey,” I wailed. “It’s aawwwwwful. I can’t find aaaaaaaanything. Well, I can’t find anything that’s not $300. What am I going to doooooooooooooooooooo?” I then said I was going to take one more swing through Macy’s, because fortheloveofGod MACY’S should have a suit.

Thank goodness I made that one last trip through the Petites (oh look! clothes for little people!) department, because I bagged myself a modest grey suit. It’s moderately stylish, with a cropped jacket and a slightly flared skirt, but it’s a grey pinstriped suit none the less. Best of all? It was on super secret clearance for $60. I was almost weeping in the dressing room, I was so happy.

Honestly, how do people with Real Jobs who have to wear grown up clothes do it? The clothes I saw were mostly on the tacky expensive side, and I know that’s what folks are expected to wear in the office. “Career Separates.” Oy.

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I met with Awesome Recruiter yesterday morning. By all accounts it went really well. So well, in fact, that I have an interview lined up for next Tuesday.

Something that has been missing from my job search has been feedback. Apparently, it would just kill most recruiters after the fact to give me a heads up on how I could improve my mad interviewing skillz. Are we really that litigious? Or are staffing professionals that lazy? I’m guessing it’s a combination of both.

Anyhoo… Awesome Recruiter had some great tips for me in particular, and for interviewers in general:

1. You are evaluated from the moment you pull into the parking lot to how you drive away. This really got me thinking about my entrance to an interview. I drive an 11 year old, rusty, often dirty VW. Now, I can’t wave a wand and turn it into a new Mercedes….but I can be a little better about keeping the ol’ rustbucket clean. Oh, and that cracked windshield should prolly get itself fixed. (ahem)
2. Um, Lisa, you might want to step up your dress. As in, dress more formally for interviews. Since I had worked for Green Nonprofit for quite awhile, I had gotten into the habit of dressing very casually. “Stepping it up” for me, for a long while, has been…uh…wearing socks? I’m out of practice with dressing like a grown up, and apparently it shows. Guess who’ll be going out shopping this weekend?
3. It’s great to be outgoing, but tone it down in an interview. This isn’t the first time I’ve heard this one directly said to me. I’m a confident, bubbly, enthusiastic person. I enjoy my chosen field and can get revved up quite easily when I talk about it. I don’t have to put a blanket over my light, just a lampshade. I should overwhelm ‘em with content, not the delivery.

Ok, none of these tips are earthshaking. But I cannot express how valuable they are to me. I also notice that none of them have to do with my actual accomplishments and professional experience. They all have to to with presentation, the “packaging” of myself as a product.  

I intend to follow these suggestions as best as I can not only on Tuesday, but at any other interviews I may score in the future. Of course there will be more, for I am the interviewingest unemployed person in Michigan.

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… accounting folks really shouldn’t go out on vacation a few days before the end of a fiscal year. Right?

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My fella has two batches of MEAT marinating in the fridge. Tonight, he’ll be sticking them in a dehydrator and making his own beef jerky. One batch is teriyaki, and the other is “sweet & spicy.”

I am very impressed. I may be a treehugger, but dang, I love me some jerky.

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Last Friday, I interviewed for a position in a non-union (let angels sing from the heavens)manufacturing facility. The work would be similar to work I’ve done before. There’s a lot more health & safety than I’ve been in charge of previously, but it looks like things are pretty well-established. The position handles the entire Human Resources function for a site of about 130. It’s a Lone Wolf position, which is not really what I am looking for, but there are some peers in a local home office. The worst part of the job is working every other Saturday. On top of the M-F. So, every other week, I’d be working a six-day work week.

That kinda sucks. But you know what sucks more? Not having a steady paycheck. And not having health insurance.

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Tomorrow, I have an interview with a local headhunter/ recruiter. One of her questions to me was: “hey, they really burn through good people at Green Nonprofit (my former employer), don’t they?” It was hard not to dish on my former boss then and there (how she was a micromanaging psycho), but I kept it professional. But oh, I was tempted.

Anyhoo, the woman I am meeting tomorrow is the shit! one of the better known HR recruiters in the area. I’m excited to meet her for a number of reasons, not the least of which was this statement:

Lisa, I have jobs.

Ms. Awesome Recruiter, I hope you do.

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It’s way more dangerous than getting a tie stuck in a shredder.

Listening to really, really good music on your mp3 player….earbuds cranked….music so absorbing that your gaze is over and beyond your computer screen.

It doesn’t look like you’re working. It merely looks like you’re catatonic. It’s no secret that “Look Busy” is the temp worker’s mantra.

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Tunes referred to in this post are here.

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Being a Greenhorn (all four grandparents off the boat from Portugal) raised in southeast Massachusetts, I have a soft spot for all things Portuguese. I was thrilled to see one of my favorite bloggers, Elise from Simply Recipes, feature a recipe for Salt Cod Stew.

Bacalao is a bit of an acquired taste. Cod, a very plain and mild white fish is salt-dried until all the moisture has been drawn out. This process preserves the fish and concentrates the flavor. To reconstitute the fish takes about 24 hours, by soaking and rinsing. My mom was not a huge fan of it, but I’ve had it a few times in stews like the one Elise featured. I think it’s yummy, but the fish flavor is very strong. For a robust stew with potatoes and onions and garlic, it’s perfect.

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Since I am working as a temp on a whirlwind tour (woohoo! I should make t-shirts!) of workplaces in southeast Michigan, I get to see a fair amount of function and dysfunction in the office. Workplaces are like families, in that there are characters who pop up over and over again. Just ask Scott Adams, creator of Dilbert; heck, he’s made a whole career of documenting them.

Today, I’d like to shine the laser pointer on The Perceived Slacker.

Identification of The Perceived Slacker in its workplace habitat is easy, since all you have to do is keep your ears open. Oh yes, the ears are more important than the eyes in this case. There will be a cluster of workers talking about The Perceived Slacker in hushed tones. No one wants to be heard discussing this person, but every one wants to be in on the conversation. Listen closely. Here are examples of what you’ll hear:

Doesn’t his boss see him just playing on the Internet all day long?

What does she do?

You know, when I do (insert task here) I make sure I (insert lengthy list of actions here). Him? Hmmmmph. He just (insert one very short task here).

Where is she? If I left early as much as she did, I’d get fired.

These chats are whispered. The participants always have a lookout, and can break their huddle at a moment’s notice.

Usually The Perceived Slacker is a friendly sort. They have supreme small talk skills. Weather! TV! Local news! They can chitchat about it all. Their coworkers are pleasant to their face, but engage in an undercurrent of gossip behind their back. The Perceived Slacker is either oblivious to what others think of them, or they know and just don’t give a flying crap.

This situation begs the question: What’s worse- having someone on the Team who doesn’t seem to be pulling their weight, or the reactions of others to that perception?

I get that there’s a feeling of camaraderie when people band together and bitch about someone. I know that there are frustrations in every workplace. But you know what? It’s just not very nice.

And The Perceived Slacker, if he or she is truly and honestly slacking, will dig their own hole. So there.

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What Breed of Dog Are You?

My Result: Bernese Mountain Dog

No bones about it, you’re a good-hearted, people-loving Bernese Mountain Dog. Down-to-earth and loyal, no one works or plays harder than you do. You put your nose to the grindstone when it really counts, but you never neglect your social calendar. Simultaneously strong and sweet, you’re very tuned-in to the feelings and needs of the other dogs you run with. Without having to be asked, you always have a helping paw to lend and a sympathetic shoulder to lean on. “Communication” is your middle name, and when that’s paired with your unswerving devotion, you get a breed that everyone respects and trusts. Woof!

What are you?
http://web.tickle.com/jumpto?test=dogogt&c=50652

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